Pleased to meet Ya

Now it's time to say Hello to me and all my kin
I would like to thank you folks for kindly droppin' in
You're all invited back again to this locality
To have a heapin' helpin' of our hospitality!
Hillbilly, that is, sit a spell, take your shoes off
Y'all come back now, ya hear?

--adapted from "The Beverly Hillbillies" by Paul Henning

Tuesday, March 30, 2010


We are moving in a few hours. As you all know, I love my expect me to get back to blogging as quick as I can! Have a great Easter week!


Saturday, March 27, 2010

Big Red Hummer Bunny

Wild N Wacky Weekends

Free Easter Bunnies
Have any of you ever bought your little one a bunny for Easter? Well, if you plan to this year, it is suggested that you go to Long Beach City College in California. Seems they are overrun by abandoned Easter bunnies. How many colleges do you know of that has a "Rabbit Population Management Task Force"? Actually it has become quite a serious problem. They are domesticated, and don't know how to fend for themselves. Besides hurting each other in territorial battles, many are suffering from syphilis. The students at the college have to watch their step, as they are constantly tripping over them. In order to help control the problem, last week they spayed or neutered about 80 of them. I think that people just need to stick to chocolate Easter bunnies.

Hummer Carriage?
Given the choice, would you prefer to own a Hummer or a fancy horse Carriage? I guess artist Jeremy Dean couldn't decide either. So, he just bought a used Hummer H2, cut it in half, modified it, added some horses, and now enjoys his Sunday drives around Central Park. (I wish I could post a pic, but I couldn't find one in Public domain.) So, tell me, would you want one?

When you were a kid, did you used to make paper chains out of gum wrappers? Kids nowadays just don't even know what gum chewin is all about. You had to buy the right know...Juicy Fruit, Big Red, etc. Well, Gary Duschl has been making a continuous paper chain from his gum wrappers since 1965! His paper chain is now 12 miles long. Every night his sets in the den and works on his chain while watching sports. Of course, the den must be devoted pretty much to the they can't move it much. Currently it weighs 900 pounds. A marathon is 26.2 miles...which is how long Duschl wants his chain to be. He thinks it will take him until he's 70 years old. And no, he doesn't eat chew all that gum. In fact if you could just CLICK HERE, then you can help him out. No, he won't accept chains. He wants his marathon to be a one man show. But, he could sure use an empty wrapper or two...or a thousand or two!

Well, that's your weird and wacky weekend news. You just never know what you're gonna read when you read a Hillbilly Housewife blog!

Friday, March 26, 2010

A true Hillbilly Blog

When I was young, and I'd see a dead animal on the side of the road, I'd ask what it was and my dad would always say "It was a Mongoose" then he'd laugh and laugh. And my mom would laugh. I never understood what was so funny about that. I found out later that they were 'possums, and that we don't have Mongoose here, but I'm still not so sure why it was so funny. 'Possums are quite plentiful here in Mo. To me, they are nasty little things that look like a huge rat. And if you are hankering to fix roadkill stew, possums make a fine main ingredient!

Why Opossum Has A Bare Tail
(Creek/Muscogee Tribe)
retold by
S. E. Schlosser

One day, Opossum was walking in the woods around sunset when he spied Raccoon. Now Opossum had always admired Raccoon because he had a beautiful tail with rings all around it.
So Opossum went up to Raccoon and said: "How did you get those pretty rings on your tail?"
Raccoon stroked his fluffy long tail fondly and said: "Well, I wrapped bark around the tail here and here and here," he pointed. "Then I stuck my tail into the fire. The fur between the strips of bark turned black and the places underneath the bark remained white, just as you see!"
Opossum thanked the Raccoon and hurried away to gather some bark. He wrapped the bark around his furry tail, built a big bonfire, and stuck his tail into the flames. Only the bonfire was too hot and too fierce. It instantly burned all of the hair off the Opossum's tail, leaving it entirely bare.
Opossum wailed and moaned when he saw his poor tail, but there was nothing he could do but wait for the fur to grow back. Opossum waited and waited and waited. But the tail was too badly burnt by the fire and the fur did not grow back. Opossum's tail remained bare for the rest of his life.
Opossum tails have been bare ever since.
Possum Stew

One possum, skinned, pieced
Couple of onions, potatos, other veggies of choice. ..chop or slice em ....however
1 can of mushroom soup
2 cans of beef gravy
1 can of water
Tbsp each of pepper, garlic salt

Boil the possum meat in a large pot of water with a half cup of salt for about half a day.
Pour the water out and add all the stuff to it.
Bring to a boil, then simmer covered 4 to 8 hrs.
Serves 8 (or 1 for a week).
Gravy is good sopped up with week old bread.
(TIP: 3 day old roadkill is more tender and easier to skin)



I think that I shall never see
A poem lovely as a tree

With ’possums clinging to each limb
Like tiny, pink-tailed cherubim.

A ’possum thinks of God all day,
And lifts her gaze as though to pray;

A ’possum may in Summer scare
A nest of robins from her lair;

And winter’s snow she does disdain,
Although she will acquaint with rain.

Poems are made by fools like us’em,
But only God can make a ’possum.

Thursday, March 25, 2010

5 Days and a Map

I am a bit saddened that for 5 days coming up (April 1-5), I won't be able to blog. Yes, we are quite excited about the move, as I am getting a nice sewing room (finally), and the boys will have their own rooms (quite needed as they are 12 years apart in age), my husband has a better job opportunity, but I have to give up the internet 5 days to do so! Yikes!

Those 5 days are perhaps the most important 5 days of the entire year to our family. When I was growing up, we went to a church that had a Maundy Thursday service. It was a re-enactment of the Last Supper, and the events following. It was quite convicting. And I remember every year, about a month before Easter the church would pass out little bags for "Thirty Pieces of Silver". I am not sure what the special offering was for, but I remember trying to save 30 quarters for my bag if I could. Sometimes I had to put in dimes and nickels to get it up to 30. How I miss those special services! Anyway, I was just thinking with my fingers (thinking 'outloud' is almost a thing of the past, isn't it?) about how sad it is we will be all wrapped up in moving on some of the most important days of the year!!

My son has also been reflecting on the upcoming holiday. Seth loves writing poetry, for sure, but he really, really loves to write Haiku poems the best. Maybe it's the challenge of getting the exact amount of syllables per line, or maybe it's the fact that they are short, so finished quickly. I am not sure, but he has a great time writing Haiku's! I enjoy sharing them with you.

 (and he's in bed so I can't ask him what the title is!)
a Haiku by Seth
Jesus so loving
He died for our very sins
Only God there is.

Yesterday my daughter and I went to the city to get the little tiny guy an Easter outfit. Big mistake. There was road construction outside of St. Louis, and we were stuck on the highway a very long time. We aren't really very familiar with the area, so I had to call my husband and have him look up another route to get us home that didn't involve a bunch of highway construction. When we (finally) did get home, I had an email from him. He had written a little "Thursday Thought" for me...

These days there are a plethora of ways to map a journey. Between GPS units that actually speak to you as you drive and multiple internet websites providing turn by turn directions, it is easy to find something or someone willing to tell you how to get where you want to go. But when you compare, there are almost always variations in the directions. So which route is best? Which takes less time, is more scenic, or has smoother roads? It is a geometrical fact that the shortest distance between two points is a straight line, so that is my motto when traveling anywhere, and the reason I still prefer a good old fashioned map. I can simply lay it out, find my starting point and destination, and trace the most direct route. A good map will never fail you.

Likewise, there are many today willing to give you directions to heaven. And although the intended destination is the same, there are always variations in the route they tell you to take. Some are more difficult than others, laden with hard work maneuvering rough roads and highway tolls of good deeds to pay. Others direct you down smooth freeways on which you can just set the cruise control of baptism, a spoken prayer, or church attendance, simply coasting your way into heaven. But neither will get you there. Jesus said, “I am the way, the Truth, and the Life. No one comes to the Father but through me (John 14:6).” If heaven is your desired destination, Jesus is the route you must take. Because His yoke is light, the way is sometimes smooth and easy. Oftentimes, however, the trip seems long due to construction zones and narrow roads. Occasionally you’ll break down and must wait for repairs. Just remember, the shortest distance between two points is a straight line, and that line runs through Jesus. His Word is the only roadmap you need.

Wednesday, March 24, 2010

I Cant Get Rid of IT!

Is this how you feel today? Tried everything to get rid of it? Seth addresses headaches today in his blog...
Alot of people are having headache problems right now, so here are some home remedies to help them. Headaches are not always called by illness. Most of the time they are caused by not getting enough sleep, stress, and lack of liquid in your body. Calming tea made out of lavendar, catnip and rose petal is very helpful. Also, rest and drink LOTS of water. Go outside, breathe deeply and take a nice walk. Some ginger tea will help alot; being affective as powerful prescription drugs.You can also soak in a lavendar or catnip bath to help with stress headaches. That's it for now. Next week we are going to talk about how to make herbal teas! Bye, Seth
Just a note from Seth's mom...he does have his own etsy and will be opening it back up after we move. I think he wants to make up teas, bath bags, etc. He'd love to grow his own plants, but we are moving to rental property. Rats! Anyway, I know several of you enjoy Seth's blogs, so I will let you know when we get his shop open again.

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Monday on Tuesday that is Almost Wednesday, HUH?

What fun I have for you today for Mission Minded Monday! What?! You say it's Tuesday? Well, someone needs to tell my 3 month old to give mom more time to write her blogs. Not to mention packing for our BIG move! But, my 'non-profit' find for the week was just too good to put off til next Monday. Take a look >>

First let me intro Laughing Vixen Lounge..."1 part Sassy, 1 part Sexy, 1 part Superhero. Mix 'til Amazing and garnish with Laughter. Wear and be Fabulous! Repeat as needed."

 Aren't those fun? But, here's the reason I chose this Etsy artisan for today's feature...

This is the second year for
The project raises money for

The Laughing Vixen Lounge is currently donating a portion of every sale to this no-kill dog shelter. But, check out what she's going to do just for you blog readers(!!)...
"I'll also donate a $1 for anyone who follows my blog, facebook or twitter. $1 for each they do. They just need to leave a comment on your post and let me know which they have done and who they are on each site so I can see them. Until April 21."
Isn't that generous?? I know a bunch of you are dog lovers, here are her will only take a minute to make a difference! Here's her pages...

I'm going to go raise some money for this dog shelter...come with me?

Friday, March 19, 2010

Stephen's Big Adventure

Instead of Folklore Friday, my son Stephen asked if he could have a turn at my blog. I am a very fair mom, so, of course, I said yes. (After all, Seth gets to!) Here is what Stephen had to say...

Today my mommy took me on a big adventure! She's always talking about how much she loves to hike; so, she took me on my first trip through the woods. She said we need our hiking shoes, so I chose my red boots...
I was sure excited about my first trip into the woods...

Of course, before a big hike, I really needed some nourishment to make sure I could make it all the way. We found this neat rock to sit on. Mom and I think God made it just for us. It was a nice place to eat my snack...

This is the view from where we were snacking. I had never been near a creek before. It sounded cool...

Now, that I had eaten, it was time to get all ready for the hike. We found another nice hiker to take our picture. Do you see me?

Mom said some of the terrain was pretty tough. We had to go up hills, through streams, and over boulders. Here are some of the places we went...

We went a long ways, but when mommy saw this sign she made us turn around a go back. She said two miles was enough. I don't think that was fair.

That's okay though, because I met some great friends on my big adventure. This man had his feet in the water. Mom said I couldn't. She wasn't fair again...

I did find a nice doggy...

And another new friend. She let me try out her bike. I told daddy I want one of these...He asked if I meant the lady or the bike. The bike, of course, silly daddy!...

Here I am at the end of my big day. Usually I giggle and talk all through my bath, but tonight I was just too tired...

Good night!!

Thursday, March 18, 2010

The stink wears off

Cool Breeze
(another Haiku by Seth)
Cool Breeze in Forest
Changes to a Powerful Wind,
then Cool Breeze Again

by Mary Carolyn Davies
The day before April
Alone, Alone,
I walked to the woods
And I sat on a stone.

I sat on a broad stone
And sang to the birds.
The tune was God's making
But I made the words.

And the thought for the day is a little story from my husband, Jerry:

Long, long ago; when I was 15 years old and had just obtained my learner's permit, one of my uncles let me drive the car on an old country road that had two ditches, no shoulders, and barely two lanes. I was trucking right along, as happy as could be, when we approached a little kid riding his bicycle along the right side of the roadway. I eased the car to the left and , just at the last minute, saw a dead skunk in the road. I knew I had a quick decision to make, so I weighed the consequences and ultimately decided to hit the skunk. The smell permeated the car almost instantly. My uncle looked at me and asked without any hint of compassion in his voice, "Why did you do that?!" I stated, "It was either hit the skunk or the kid!" His reply was very simple and to the point, "Next time, hit the kid." Not another word was ever spoken regarding the incident, and to this day I'm not completely convinced that he was only kidding.
The moral of the story: It's not always easy doing the right thing. In fact, it can be down right stinky. But the stink usually wears off eventually, and you can at least live with a clear conscience.

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Just Dandee!

For those that don't know, I reserve my Wednesday blog for my son, Seth. Seth has two passions...herbs and writing. During our school time, he actually loves it when he gets assigned an essay. (I've never told him that other kids don't enjoy this. Why mess up a good thing?) He has an entire library devoted to herb books, herbal remedies, even herbal remedies for your pets! We opened an etsy store for him, but had to put it on a very long vacation while I had a difficult pregnancy; hopefully we will get it up and running soon! Anyway...Seth gets the Wednesday blog spot. He had a very busy day today, so he just wrote a short paragraph this time about one of his favorite herbs...dandelions.

Dandelion can be used in several things. And it does countless things such as weight loss. It also helps in liver function, reduces cholesterol, fights diabetes, stimulates digestion. Plus lots more. Consider going out and picking these wonderous plants and cook them up or whatever you want. You can make them into teas. All parts are edible. by Seth
An afternote from mom...dandelions are very versatile! Seth is funny...he considers it a sin when people treat them with chemicals to get rid of them. You really can cook them up on the stove, add them to dishes, or even make dandelion jelly! Seth goes out every summer and harvests them, root and all, washes them up and hangs them to dry. At our house...we think God knew what he was doing when He created this little plant. They are Dandee!

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Pounce along with Tigger (and me!)

The wonderful thing about Tiggers
Is Tiggers are wonderful things.
Their tops are made of rubbers
Their bottoms are made of springs.
Fun, fun, fun, fun, FUN!!!

I love Tigger. I love playing Tigger...pounce, pounce, pounce... Have you ever Pounced over at the great Etsy sight? Many like to look at Treasuries or the Time Machine, but me...I like to Pounce. I like to discover the undiscovered.  This week I have two great new Etsy stores for you. Each is very unique. Please stop by and tell them hello! (PS. they each made brand new facebook fan pages just in time for this blog, so be sure to fan them as well!)

 First I pounced over to the

And what a treat it was!!  Xochitl, with a background as a professional artist, does absolutely wonderful professional artwork for children. Each painting is an original design ~ no two are ever alike. Have a birthday party coming up? You'll love her one of a kind party favors! After treating yourself, be sure to become her facebook fan by clicking HERE!

After feasting on sweet sights at the Sugar Cookie Studio, I found myself pouncing along through Etsy again. This time, I couldn't help stopping by a little shop by the name of

This time I certainly found something unique! Minirex is an all girl Seattle Band...that also owns an Etsy shop! The band drummer, Jen, makes the bands matching outfits. Jen's talents keep her busy! Besides being the band's drummer, and outfit designer, she owns her own bridal shop in Seattle named Cicada, where she designs and makes the dresses! Wow! Talk about talent!
The band is currently trying to raise money to record a CD. Please be sure to help them out also by becoming a facebook fan HERE.

Can't wait to Pounce again and see what other new shops there are!
(for those that don't know, there is a great feature at that showcases new shops. Bet you couldn't guess...look under POUNCE!)

Monday, March 15, 2010

Have a Heart

In 40 seconds time, at least 230,000 Haitians were killed on January 12th~one in every 50.
"I hear about the horrors the earthquake wrought. In the early days, it was utter pandemonium-everybody out on the lawn, IV-bags hanging from trees, wounded getting carried in on planks of plywood, some so badly injured that their limbs would fall off when you'd lift them..
...there were alot of amputations. Orthopedic surgeons were sawing limbs off some nights until 3 a.m.- an estimated 70 percent of surgical procedures were the removal of arms and legs. When I visit a post-op pediatric ward upstairs, six of the seven children I count are amputees, some of them double.
...Nearly two weeks after the earthquake, a baby with severe burns on all four limbs, screams like she is on fire as her bandages are removed and her wounds are cleansed. She's been kicked to three hospitals and has only been given Ibuprofen for pain. She repeatedly calls "mama, mama," but only her father is there. She is so upset, she begins vomiting. With no nurse near and nothing to wipe up a mess with, the befuddled father simply cups his hands in front of her, letting his terrified daughter heave into them...
The above excerpts were taken from an article, LOVE AMONG RUINS, at by Matt Labash.
My infant son was sound asleep as my husband read the above mentioned article (in it's entirety) to us during our family time a few days ago. After finishing the article, my husband knelt on the floor and prayed for the Haitians, and I couldn't help hugging my baby to my chest, and thinking "What if it was us?" (We currantly live in an earthquake danger zone. Besides being on the New Madrid fault line, the underground all around is us is nothing but mine tunnels. It could easily be us.) What if my baby lost an arm, had no pain killers, and no mommy to comfort him?

Please consider supporting
This is a collective of hundreds of etsy shops who have donated items to raise money for Haitian relief efforts. 100% of the procedes go to Doctors Without Borders. To date, the shop has raised more than $31,000...but we all know that there is much more to be raised. The etsy store didn't mention this, but I am positive Doctors without Borders is now serving in Chile as well.
The shop has items for all interests, all ages, and all price ranges. I saw items listed for less than $5.00 and some for over $100.00.
It's time for me to take a moment to hug my children...and pray together for the people of Haiti.

Saturday, March 13, 2010

Lions, Cadavers, and Breastmilk~Oh My!

As I sit here at 3:00 a.m. nursing my two month old son, I was searching for the perfect news stories for my weekend post. I found one that draws my eye...
A woman in Owensboro, KY was arrested for intoxication. I guess that it kind of made her mad, because as she was putting on her prison clothes she squirted breastmilk into the face of a female deputy. The woman now faces charges of felony 3rd degree assault. (I made a mental note not to let my infant son hear this story. I've squirted him in the face numerous times!)
Every year about this time I look forward to my favorite candy...yep, Cadbury Eggs. But, perhaps this sweet treat isn't the thing for you. Perhaps you like a little bacon with your eggs instead. Well, Vosges Chocolate has the perfect candy for your egg and bacon loving palatte. Five bacon caramel filled chocolate half eggs sell for just $22. Yep, you read that right. BACON caramel filled. Other flavored caramels to come in the future. What flavor do you think they should offer?

Mondays are just Mondays. They are destined to be bad days. This past Monday was no exception for a NYC funeral home director. He had pressing business. He had a certain piece of cargo that needed delivered to the airport for a scheduled flight to Miami. Leaving his van unattended, he ran back into the funeral home. He'll think twice about doing that the next time. He came back out to find van, and it's contents gone. The window placard allowing him to park legally had fallen...and a hard working police officer had the van towed...body and all. The police officer hadn't seen the cardboard casket due to the tinted windows. I'll bet he checks closer the next time.

A car thief learned to check closer for unwanted cargo. Last November said thief set his sites on a Mercedes Transporter. The thief was never caught. It is assumed that the cargo...a 5 yr old circus lion...probably roared and scared him. The vehicle was found abandoned~crashed into a street sign and still running. It seems the German police officer also overlooked the precious cargo, and had the Transporter towed. 'Caesar' was discovered hours later, hungry from her adventure but otherwise ok.

I think I'm going to grab a bite to eat. I'm hungry as a lion. Bacon and eggs comes mind...

Friday, March 12, 2010

Red Sky

For today's Friday Folklore, I thought something weather related would be fun, especially after yesterday's post. Perhaps the most famous weather proverb is:
"Red sky at night, sailors delight. Red sky in the morning, sailor take warning."

Did you know this dates back to at least the time Christ walked the earth? He made reference to it in Matthew 16:1-3. I found an explanation as to why this proverb is true (for the most part) but it was pretty scientific and meaty, so I'll spare you the details!

Here are some other fun weather related proverbs:

A year of snow, a year of plenty. (I thought this was especially relevant this year)
When the stars begin to huddle, the earth will soon become a puddle.

If after a rain you can see enough blue sky to make a pair of man's pants, it will clear.

When grass is dry at morning light, look for rain before the night.

Seagull, Seagull, Sit on the Sand...It's never good weather when you're on the land!

When the ditch and pond offend the nose, look for rain and stormy blows.

When the wind is blowing from the east~tis not fit for man or beast!

And finally, a fun folklore that will bring you a chuckle:

Michigan Winds
retold by S. E. Schlusser

Michigan winds are fiercest in the spring. Why, just last year the wind knocked one of our mountains over into a valley. Folks woke up the next day to find themselves living on a plain.

But we Michigan folks just take these happenings as a matter of course. Take my friend, Joe, for example. One March, Joe went out on his porch to eat a dessert. He had barely taken a bite out of his fresh apple pie when a wind blew his house over. Keeping his presence of mind, Joe grabbed hold of the branch of a tree to keep from being blown away. Once he had secured himself on the branch, he nabbed one of the boards floating away from his house, and used it to shield him from the wind, so he could finish eating his apple pie.

'Coarse I've heard they've also got a pretty mean wind when you cross the border into Canada. There's a story I know about a British Columbia chap named Jake whose dog was blown up against his garage wall one day. That wind blew so hard and so strong that the hound dog starved to death before it quit. Jake had to scrape the poor ol' dog off the wall with a shovel. And what did he find, but that the wind had pushed the hounds shadow right into the surface of the wall. So, Jake buried the poor dog under the shadow and wrote his epitaph on it: Doggone.

Thursday, March 11, 2010

Nature's Fury

Last night as I enjoyed listening to the thunder, I was thinking about the power of God in nature, and how it has really been manifested lately with earthquakes, tsunamis, and tornado season soon upon us. Here are some 'powerful' thoughts for you to ponder for Thoughtful Thursday:

Raging River
(a Haiku poem by my son, Seth)
Mad, Raging River
Very Powerful Indeed
The Swelling River

The Laws of Nature
by Longfellow

The Laws of Nature are just, but terrible.
There is no weak mercy in them.
Cause and consequence are inseparable and inevitable.
The Elements have no forbearance.
The fire burns, the water drowns, the air consumes, the earth buries.

And perhaps it would be well for our race if the punishment of crimes against the law of man were as inevitable as the punishment of crimes against the laws of nature~were man as unerring in his judgment as nature.

And some final thoughts from my husband, Jerry:
Even as descriptive and moving as this poem is, Longfellow fell far short of the power and purpose of nature. In reference to this poem, I believe God would tell Longfellow to read the words He breathed centuries ago: "From the breath of God, ice is made. He disperses the cloud of His lightening. It changes direction by His guidance. Whether for correction, or for His world, He causes it to happen." (Job 37:10-13)

We need to look no further than Haiti for a reminder of the awesome and oftentimes destructive power of nature. But we must always remember that not even the smallest raindrop falls outside of the sovereign will of God, who wields nature for justice as well as mercy and blessing. Punishment, as Longfellow puts it, is not a "law of nature." Just Judgment comes only from God. Nature is merely His tool. Longfellow said, "Were man as unerring of his judgment of nature." He should have said, "Were man as unerring in his worship of the Creator of nature." Only then can we truly understand and accept the blessing, as well as the tragedy, of nature.

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Not Just for Cats!

This is the first of my blog posts from my 12 year old son. He will be my contributor for most Wednesday posts. He has studied Herbs quite extensively over the last 2 years, and actually has his own etsy shop devoted to his herbal products. (It's on vacation right now until mom gets her act together.) Here's Seths first Well Within Wednesday post: (ps I took it word for word, so remember...a 12 year old wrote it!)

Hi! I'm Seth. I love herbs, but my favorite is catnip for more than one reason.
Reason #1 is that you can bug cats with it. But, the real reason is it's GR8 with kids and adults both! Light teas may sooth colic, restlessness, and nervousness.
In strong tea it can cure fevers and upset tummies and help prevent diarrhea and nausea.
When put into a bath it can help heal irritated skin.
Plant Description: It is 2-3 feet high. Long stem. Heart shaped, toothed leaves with downy fur. Anything above ground can be used.
That's it for now, bye. Seth.
Let me know what you think of my sons post. He would love comments!