Pleased to meet Ya

Now it's time to say Hello to me and all my kin
I would like to thank you folks for kindly droppin' in
You're all invited back again to this locality
To have a heapin' helpin' of our hospitality!
Hillbilly, that is, sit a spell, take your shoes off
Y'all come back now, ya hear?

--adapted from "The Beverly Hillbillies" by Paul Henning

Friday, March 26, 2010

A true Hillbilly Blog

When I was young, and I'd see a dead animal on the side of the road, I'd ask what it was and my dad would always say "It was a Mongoose" then he'd laugh and laugh. And my mom would laugh. I never understood what was so funny about that. I found out later that they were 'possums, and that we don't have Mongoose here, but I'm still not so sure why it was so funny. 'Possums are quite plentiful here in Mo. To me, they are nasty little things that look like a huge rat. And if you are hankering to fix roadkill stew, possums make a fine main ingredient!

Why Opossum Has A Bare Tail
(Creek/Muscogee Tribe)
retold by
S. E. Schlosser

One day, Opossum was walking in the woods around sunset when he spied Raccoon. Now Opossum had always admired Raccoon because he had a beautiful tail with rings all around it.
So Opossum went up to Raccoon and said: "How did you get those pretty rings on your tail?"
Raccoon stroked his fluffy long tail fondly and said: "Well, I wrapped bark around the tail here and here and here," he pointed. "Then I stuck my tail into the fire. The fur between the strips of bark turned black and the places underneath the bark remained white, just as you see!"
Opossum thanked the Raccoon and hurried away to gather some bark. He wrapped the bark around his furry tail, built a big bonfire, and stuck his tail into the flames. Only the bonfire was too hot and too fierce. It instantly burned all of the hair off the Opossum's tail, leaving it entirely bare.
Opossum wailed and moaned when he saw his poor tail, but there was nothing he could do but wait for the fur to grow back. Opossum waited and waited and waited. But the tail was too badly burnt by the fire and the fur did not grow back. Opossum's tail remained bare for the rest of his life.
Opossum tails have been bare ever since.
Possum Stew

One possum, skinned, pieced
Couple of onions, potatos, other veggies of choice. ..chop or slice em ....however
1 can of mushroom soup
2 cans of beef gravy
1 can of water
Tbsp each of pepper, garlic salt

Boil the possum meat in a large pot of water with a half cup of salt for about half a day.
Pour the water out and add all the stuff to it.
Bring to a boil, then simmer covered 4 to 8 hrs.
Serves 8 (or 1 for a week).
Gravy is good sopped up with week old bread.
(TIP: 3 day old roadkill is more tender and easier to skin)



I think that I shall never see
A poem lovely as a tree

With ’possums clinging to each limb
Like tiny, pink-tailed cherubim.

A ’possum thinks of God all day,
And lifts her gaze as though to pray;

A ’possum may in Summer scare
A nest of robins from her lair;

And winter’s snow she does disdain,
Although she will acquaint with rain.

Poems are made by fools like us’em,
But only God can make a ’possum.

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